The end of this recent entry is brilliant and made me want to move to Chicago and sit next to her on the bus. Here's that excerpt:
Same El ride, honest to god. It was an action-packed commute! A lady with really hairy arms sat next to me, and her hairy arms are neither here nor there but it was something I noticed when I did the Urban Eye Slide peripheral glance to see what she was reading. She was reading a little Christian pamphlet, hey cool not my thing but whatever. Then Christian Tract Lady put that away and got out a small stack of identical pamphlets, and sat there quietly for a while. Even though my nose was still in my book I just knew her plan was to distribute these in some way, probably starting with me. I was right. And because I was feeling restless and frisky (I blame you, Dud Avocado), I then did something kind of weird.
CTL: Can I interest you in some of my literature?
Me: No. Can I interest you in some of mine?
CTL: Oh...well...what's it about?
[already rummaging in my bag] Me: Hmmm. [hands her a Target receipt, which was the only giveaway paper I could find] It seems to be about what I bought at Target.
CTL [with angry look]: No thank you. [she gets up and walks down the train aisle]
Me [calling after her]: But I think you'll find it very edifying!I think my tract did not look professional enough, that must be the problem. I'm off to Kinko's to print up and staple together some of my Theories, so I can be ready for the next time.
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