One day last week when I arrived to pick up Mar from kindergarten, I immediately knew something was up.
As Mar tried to pass through the gate, she was held back by the teacher's assistant. Mar's expression flashed from lackadaisical to fearful.
The assistant asked me to wait.
I waited and began to worry.
"What now?" was my first thought. I caught Mar's gaze, looking for a clue as to what infraction had brought about the conference I was about to have.
When all the other children were either tucked into their slots on the bus or trundled away by parents, I was ushered closer to my daughter and her teacher.
The teacher's assistant looked down at Mar and asked her to tell me why we were standing in the school yard instead flitting off to daycare.
Mar looked at the ground.
The assistant knelt down, looked at Mar, then up at me. "Margaret said a bad word today."
I immediately plastered a horrified expression on my face and listened authoritatively as the teacher explained to Mar that such words were not to be used at school.
I supported the teacher and her assistant as they discussed the complete ban on "bad" words at school.
Mar began to cry. She will always cry when faced with negative attention. However, I could tell that she did feel bad about her utterance.
As we walked slowly to the car, I asked her the one question that I was dying to have answered but wouldn't have dared to ask the teachers: "What did you say?"
Mar replied in a quiet, tentative voice, "I said, 'Damn you.' "
I was so relieved.
It could have been much worse.
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